Thursday, August 28, 2008

Third grade angst...

So Rick thought that my Soda in the Desk story yesterday was rather weird. And hey, I admitted that I was a weird kid… and yes, an only slightly less weird adult. But that’s just me. And I’d rather be a little bit weird than a run-of-the-mill conformist who follows the herd. (Because where’s the fun in THAT?) :)

Still, I feel I must clarify something about my third grade soda story. In third grade, my teacher’s name was Mrs. Tieckelmann. And Mrs. Tieckelmann was a scary, scary woman. Or at least she was scary to an eight year old. Perhaps adults found her to be a perfectly pleasant, friendly person – but in our classroom, she seemed anything but. She was tall, and thin, and angular, and she wore thick glasses that made her eyes look big and constantly attentive. As she walked around the room, gliding between aisles and looking over shoulders at our daily assignments, she reminded me of a bird of prey – it seemed like she was circling overhead, waiting for her chance to swoop in and peck out our livers. She would tell us stories of her own childhood, when her parents would smack her hand with a ruler if her handwriting wasn’t executed just so. And for some reason, this only made her seem even more frightening – as if she still had that ruler somewhere, stashed on her person, ready to brandish at a moment’s notice. (And I never HAVE had very good handwriting…)

Our class was divided into groups for our reading lessons, depending on which reading level we’d achieved. And I remember one particular day, as my small group gathered for our reading lesson, that I suddenly realized I’d forgotten my reading homework. I remember it so well, because I’m not sure I’d ever before that (or even any time after, in all my years of school) forgotten a homework assignment. And I was dreading what would happen when Mrs. Tieckelmann realized it – and sure enough, even though it happened only ONE time, the Bird of Prey scolded me in front of all my peers and ordered me out to the hallway to finish the assignment. And what I found particularly unfair about this treatment was that I'd been seated across the table from a boy who made it a HABIT to forget his homework. He probably misplaced or forgot an assignment once a week. And yet HE seemed to get a free pass every time. Never scolded harshly, never sent out alone into the hallway – no, that was reserved only for me. And I could justify this treatment by assuming Mrs. Tieckelmann EXPECTED me to do better, whereas that other kid was an habitual slacker – but who knows if that’s really what was going on? At the time, I just assumed the Bird of Prey hated me and liked the other kid more…

Mrs. Tieckelmann also constantly wore a giant black scuba diving watch – apparently she was a scuba diver. But she wore the watch with everything – I often wondered if she owned another watch. What if she had to dress up for a fancy dinner out somewhere? Would she still wear the ugly, clunky watch? And why on earth was she wearing that watch when we all lived in Buffalo, New York?? Not much decent scuba diving in Buffalo… unless people make a habit of diving into Lake Erie… which I seriously can’t imagine…

So perhaps if I’d had a teacher I perceived as friendly and nice, I wouldn’t have been nearly so anxious about the half-empty soda can. But as it was, I felt like I was constantly on edge in Mrs. Tieckelmann’s classroom. If one forgotten homework assignment set her off, who knows what a little spilled soda would do? It was best to make no waves… because someone so enamored with scuba diving would certainly notice…

I think it was Mrs. Tieckelmann who once told my mom that I was a “worry wart” (a rather strange expression, if you ask me…). But I wonder if she knew that SHE was the source of much of my third grade worry? Probably not…

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

This is why juice boxes were invented...

Well, school has officially begun here in Austin (yea! Let’s go to the mall! :)). It’s hard to believe that autumn is just around the corner, what with the stifling heat we’re still experiencing on a daily basis. (Although thankfully, the weeks of 100-plus degree weather seem to be over.) I had an elementary school flashback yesterday, as I was browsing through my friends’ profiles on Facebook and looking at pictures of kids with new backpacks and first-day-of-school smiles. I was thinking of the end of my third grade year, when my class had a little “last week of school” party, and we all brought sack lunches and cans of soda. I had a Sprite – I can still remember that, because the silly, innocuous can of Sprite became the source of much anxiety…

After we ate lunch, we were supposed to throw away all our trash, of course. And I did throw away my brown paper bag and whatever remnants of food were left inside. But I’d only drank about half the soda. I’ve never been able to finish an entire can of soda – not even now, as an adult. So forget my eight-year-old self trying to polish off twelve ounces of Sprite – that was never gonna happen. And the weird little anxious worrying part of me couldn’t help but think that if I tried to throw the can away, all that soda would spill out into the garbage can (which was actually probably little more than a flimsy plastic bag that we passed around the room). So instead of tossing the half-empty can in the garbage, I decided, for some reason, to tuck the can in the very back corner of my desk – these were the kinds of desks with hinged tops, so you could lift the “desk” part up and stash all your books and paper and pencils in the storage area underneath. So along with all my books and paper and pencils, a half-consumed can of Sprite resided in the cavernous recesses of my desk for the rest of the year…

And then the last day of school arrived, and it was time to return all our books to the School Textbook Keepers (whoever they are…), and pack up all our projects, and throw away the papers and broken pencils and partly-used bottles of glue we no longer needed. So again, the trash bags were passed around the room, and all of us soon-to-be fourth graders eagerly disposed of the contents of our desks. And as the hands on the clock inched closer and closer to Freedom Time, my worried little mind wandered to that solitary can of Sprite hiding in the back of my desk. Well, I certainly couldn’t throw it away NOW – even if I could manage to gingerly place it in the garbage can without spilling any soda, how could I possibly explain to my teacher and the other kids why I still had a can of soda in my desk?? And so it remained – left behind, all alone in my desk, an almost-instantaneous memory the moment the bell rang.

A memory, that is, until the night before I began my fourth-grade year. As I fell asleep that night, a bizarre fear overcame me – what if, months ago after I left my third grade classroom, someone found that can of soda? Surely the janitor had cleaned out all the desks by now, in preparation for a new class. What if my name was still inside that desk somewhere?? Did someone know that I’d failed to throw away my trash?? What if someone reached inside to grab the can, and accidentally flung warm, flat soda all over the room?? Would it be my fault??? Would I get detention??? Would this go on my permanent record?!? Was the principal going to meet me on the steps of the school with a pair of kid-sized handcuffs and a tazer?!?!?

I can still remember the anxiety as I walked into school that year. Tentatively, with much trepidation, I crossed the threshold from hallway to fourth-grade classroom, half-expecting a police officer to jump in front of me and say, “not so fast, there, missy… aren’t YOU the one who left that can of Sprite in your desk? Yeah, you’re gonna have to come downtown for questioning…” But, to my utter relief, it became apparent after a few hours that no one seemed to care. No one had said a thing. No scary police officers, no principal, no janitor… and surely by NOW that soda can was gone. Finally tossed into a garbage can by some unknown person, who, to my amazement, didn’t turn me in to the authorities. At last I was able to focus on my new status as Fourth Grader.

Gosh, I was a weird kid… (and I’m only slightly less weird as an adult…) :)

Friday, August 22, 2008

Friday random thoughts...

So it’s been a quiet week… no news on the Chicago job front, which is starting to seriously wear on Rick AND me – it’s so frustrating to have no idea whether I should be packing things up in the house, and cleaning it to get ready to show it, and searching for home listings in Chicago, etc, etc, etc. What am I supposed to be doing? Could someone tell me already? This is getting ridiculous…

But at least ONE member of the extended family is moving to Chicago – Kiko, mom and dad’s crazy little calico cat, is heading up to her new home in Eric’s condo today. She was okay when the only other cat around was Ozzie – patient, nothing-ever-fazes-him Ozzie. But then Dusty came along, and Kiko was NOT happy with that. And then Tiger and Koala… and pretty soon, Kiko had decided she’d had enough of all these other cats trying to steal her much-deserved spotlight. SHE is supposed to be the queen of the house, thank you very much. So hopefully, a change of venue and an entire condo all to herself will be just the thing Kiko needs to be a content little cat once again…

Yesterday was our fifteenth wedding anniversary. (What??? Fifteen years?? Wasn’t I just fifteen years OLD not too long ago? I mean, I can’t be much more than twenty by now, right? Fifteen years… that’s crazy… :)) It’s funny, because the anniversary I remember most vividly is our seventh – we were on a cruise in the Baltic Sea (that was a great cruise, too – the cruise where we met Crazy Estonian Tour Guide Guy), and someone had told our waiter that it was our 7th anniversary. But somewhere the communication was a bit muddled up, because after dinner we were presented with a cake that read “Happy 70th Birthday.” We’re not sure if it was supposed to go to a different table, or if the person who wrote on the cake misunderstood – but either way, I thought it was pretty hilarious. We should’ve had a “Happy 150th Birthday” cake yesterday…

So has everyone been watching the Olympics? I was really having fun watching Michael Phelps compete – but I’ve kinda lost interest since then. Although I am interested to see what happens with that whole Chinese gymnast controversy. Those girls really DO look pretty young… but then again, the people at Yankee Stadium thought I was 14 until I was about 20 – so who am I to judge??

My ugly kitchen burn is healing pretty nicely… although I won’t be surprised if I have a scar left over. I think from now on, I’ll just cook everything wearing oven mitts. I’ll boil water with oven mitts, and make soup with oven mitts, and chop vegetables with oven mitts… I’ll even serve up bowls of ice cream with oven mitts (yeah, that’s right – haven’t you heard of freezer burn?). The point is, my arms will always be protected from the lurking dangers of the kitchen… I think it’s a reasonable precaution…

I can’t believe that August is winding down already. That means school will be starting soon, which in turn means that a trip to the mall in the middle of the week will be much quieter, less hectic, and a lot more pleasant. I love it when school starts. (As opposed to when I had to GO to school, at which time I HATED it when school started. But now I can say stuff like, “hahaha! I get to go to the mall in the middle of the week and all you kids have to go to school! Haha!” You can see how much I’ve matured since I was a kid…)

Well, that’s about it for now. I hope everyone has a great weekend! And now I’m going to put on some oven mitts and reheat my coffee in the microwave…

Thinking happy Chicago thoughts...

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Eeeewww...

Check out what my klutzy self did the other day:


Burned my arm... if you look closely, you can see the blistering around the edges… yup, that’s a nice second-degree-er right there. I made dinner the other night in a stainless steel pan – you can use it on the stove OR in the oven, and it had been in a 400-degree oven for about a half hour. I then CAREFULLY removed it with a heavy oven mitt and set it on the stove. I’m always SO careful around hot ovens and hot stoves. So very, very careful. But I had to sauté some garlic to toss with a bowl of broccoli, so I reached over the (extremely hot) stainless steel pan to turn the burner on, temporarily forgetting that the ENTIRE PAN (including the handle) had just come out of the oven. And my arm was just kind of resting on that handle for a second or so –or specifically, however long it takes the signal for “your arm is really, really hurting right now” to travel up your nerves to your brain. Ouch…

And I could swear that ERIC used to be the really klutzy one in the family. He was the one who broke his thumb playing with a Nerf ball – I mean, c’mon… you HAVE to be a klutz to break your thumb while you’re playing with a Nerf ball, right? But lately, I seem to be surpassing Eric’s penchant for klutziness with my ability to continually bump my arms into the doorknob in the bathroom, or to bump my elbow on the dryer door (which I did today), or hit myself in the face with the pantry door (yeah, don’t even ask how I managed that one… I’m just glad it didn’t result in any visible bruises), or burn myself on a pan that I KNEW was really, really hot. Yep, I’m a little bit crazy…

Oh, and in case anyone was wondering – we STILL don’t know about Chicago… sigh…

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Diary of the Great Chicago Unknown...

July 15, 2007 – Chicago Watch Day 1:

Wow – Rick just found out that several jobs have opened up in Chicago, and he’s going to interview for a few of them and see what happens. It would be pretty cool to live near Eric for a while (although the winters would be a serious weather shock after living in Austin for so long). But I’m not getting my hopes up yet…

Chicago Watch Day 25:

Well, Rick had a couple really decent interviews and it looks like he’s definitely in the running for one of those Chicago jobs. Okay, NOW I’m getting my hopes up… if we lived in Chicago, we could hang out with Eric and sneak into his condo when he’s at work and rearrange all his furniture and steal all his food. (Or, you know, the box of pop tarts, carton of soy milk, and two bottles of water that pass for “food” at Eric’s place…)

Chicago Watch Day 47:

We just got back from a trip to Chicago, and we looked at some condos while we were there. There are actually TWO condos available in Eric’s building – one two doors down from him, and the other right next door. The one next door to him is awesome – I am SO gonna be Eric’s next door neighbor. (I’m not getting ahead of myself here, am I? I know, I know… I shouldn’t get my hopes up…)

Chicago Watch Day 60:

Great. Just great. They gave one of those jobs to some guy who moved to Michigan, but he begged them to let him do the job from his new location. And they’re actually going to let him try it for another quarter or so… whatever…

Chicago Watch Day 100:

Well, it looks like Chicago is off the table for now. But only temporarily. There’s a chance they could hire Rick NEXT year, like some time around February or March…

February 2008 – Chicago Watch Day 357:

The Chicago possibility is looking VERY good right now. Like practically certain. So we’re looking at condos in Chicago again – unfortunately, the two right next door to Eric were bought (by the same person, no less – they’re remodeling to create one giant supercondo). But I saw a place I LOVED on Bosworth – awesome kitchen, pretty big master bedroom, an extra room so Rick can have his home theater, a roof deck, and a one-car garage. AND it’s in our price range. We should know something within the next couple of weeks…

A Couple Weeks Later – Chicago Watch Day 784:

We STILL don’t know anything…

Chicago Watch Day 800:

Okay, there’s some kind of hiring freeze on all the Chicago jobs. They’re still THERE, but no one is being hired to fill them. Of course, this means that once they’re UNfrozen, there’s a chance we could still be moving to Chicago.

Chicago Watch Day 1245:

Well, we’re buying a new house here in Austin, so I guess we’re giving up on Chicago. I’m sad, but it’s my own fault – I really shouldn’t have gotten my hopes up…

Chicago Watch Day 1500:

I’m afraid to even say this – Chicago is looking like a definite possibility again. Rick had a GREAT interview for a job up there, and it actually looks like he’s not just in the running, but he’s the frontrunner. (But I will NOT get my hopes up again. I’m not doing a THING until we know for sure.)

Chicago Watch Day 1756:

We’ve had confirmation that Rick IS the guy they want to hire – the hiring manager said so himself. So all we need to do now is wait for the human resources department to get all the paperwork together and send Rick the offer. As long as the offer is good, we SHOULD be planning for a move soon!

Chicago Watch Day 2000:

Who is working in that human resources department? Monkeys? Garden slugs? Tree sloths who do nothing but hang upside down and chew on leaves??? Seriously – how long can it possibly take to finish up that paperwork?

Chicago Watch Day 3412:

I’m just going to be patient. That’s all there is to it. Patience. Deep breaths. Peace. Serenity. Patience…

August 12, 2008 – Chicago Watch Day 5479:

WHERE THE &#$% IS THE &#$% OFFER????

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

Weather or not...

The other day, my mom was talking about how people seem to complain about the weather more than just about any other complainable topic. (I just made up the word “complainable” – I’m going to say it means “something worth complaining about.” Hey, if “comfortability” is a word, then darn it, so is “complainable”…) And it really DOES seem to be that way – everyone talks about the weather. They talk about it when it’s too hot, or too cold, or too rainy, or not rainy ENOUGH (that’s been the talk around here lately). Usually, these conversations begin with something along the lines of “how ‘bout this heat?” or “how ‘bout this cold?” or “how ‘bout this rain?” or “where on earth is all the rain from that tropical storm that those incompetent meteorologists promised us??” (Seriously – where is it? A tropical storm hits the gulf, and all we get is a few clouds and a pitiful spritzing of leftover tropical storm mist?? This summer drought is SUCH a complainable topic…)

I guess when you think about it, the weather is one thing that everyone experiences, no matter what – rich or poor, thin or fat, democrat or republican, American or Egyptian or Japanese or Swedish or whatever. If you ever go outside, you experience the exact same weather as whoever happens to be in your general vicinity. And that makes it a great “small talk” topic. Maybe you don’t want to get into an in-depth discussion about the differences between Obama and McCain or the evils of trans fats – especially if you’re just standing in line at Starbucks and about to order a (probably trans fat-filled) muffin and simply want to be friendly to your fellow line-waiters. A casual remark about the unending heat and lack of rain is sure to resonate with everyone else in the store. It’s one of those easy, simple, non-threatening topics that can fill up random gaps in conversation…

And weather DOES seem to profoundly affect people – to the point that they use it as a deciding factor in life-changing decisions… like moving back to Texas after spending two years in New Jersey. SOMEone wasn’t very happy with the New Jersey winters (I’ll give you a hint – it wasn’t me… :)), and decided that months of unending Texas summer were easier to bear than months of unending New Jersey winter. This, of course, makes me wonder about Chicago – where months of unending winter can stretch into even MORE months of unending winter. If we move, will we soon have the ultimate complainable weather situation?? Or will the Chicago winters (although brutal at times) seem more bearable than the New Jersey winters, because we won’t be living out in the boonies this time? (Do the boonies make winter last longer???) If all goes well, we should find out soon enough…

The one place I’ve never heard any weather complaints is Hawaii – it’s hard to complain about the weather when the weather is perfect most days. Although I’m betting if I listened more closely to the locals, there might be some complaints about how one day is exactly the same as the next, and wouldn’t it be nice to get a little variety once in a while? One person’s “trapped on an island of sameness” is another person’s “tropical vacation.” Of course, it’s like that with just about any weather, I suppose. My “I hate thunder and lightning and possible tornadoes” is Rick’s “cooooooool!!”

So yeah, people complain about the weather a lot, but maybe it’s just because it’s a known commonality. It’s a much safer bet to say “how ‘bout this heat?” than to say “how ‘bout that Obama?” :)

Weather like this takes some getting used to...

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

That's hot...

So the last few weeks, I’ve noticed that my computer gets pretty hot after it’s been on for more than twenty or thirty minutes. In fact, it was feeling a little TOO hot, if you ask me. Almost like it could spontaneously combust at any random moment. I had gotten into the habit of only keeping it on for a half hour or so, and then turning it off until it cooled down. Which really seemed like a bit of a nuisance…

And then a couple days ago, Rick was using my computer for some reason, and he heard the fan inside frantically spinning in a futile effort to keep things cool. So, using a technologically advanced maneuver called “blowing on the computer vent,” he blew on the vent and a crazy cloud of dust puffed out into the air. And almost immediately, the computer began to cool down. So today I grabbed a can of compressed air and cleaned as much dust out of the vents as I could. And I’m amazed at what a difference it’s made. I mean, I WAS pretty sure that my computer hadn’t gotten so ridiculously hot when I first acquired it – so it would make sense that something needed to be tweaked. I guess I just never even thought that it could be something as simple as DUST. Who knew that something so seemingly innocuous could practically cause your computer to explode??? (Well, now I DO know…)

Although it’s funny, because this is like one of those problems that my dad would’ve suggested was simpler to figure out than most people would think. Most of us (at least those of us who don’t really know much about the inner workings of a computer) would wonder which expensive component needed to be replaced… and then we’d ask ourselves if it was actually worth it to replace an expensive component, or if it would make more sense to simply buy a new, much cooler computer. And, to be honest, I was starting to think a new computer was definitely in order. It was either a new computer or an eventual pile of smoking laptop ash…

But, just like my dad always says, the solution ended up being a great deal simpler and a lot less expensive than a new computer. Get rid of the dust. That’s it. Who’d have thought? I’m just happy that I don’t have to constantly keep a fire extinguisher on hand…

Friday, August 01, 2008

Friday random thoughts...

Wow – is it really August 1st already? What happened to June and July? I think I must’ve accidentally missed them…

This is the time of year I used to hate when I was a kid – August, the last official month of summer. After two carefree months of reckless summer vacation abandon, August was the month when everything started winding down. Oh sure, there were still a few weeks of freedom left – but something would shift in the atmosphere of daily life, and what would start as a barely imperceptible feeling of dread would slowly grow stronger and stronger toward the end of the month. It certainly didn’t help that stores had “back to school” signs displayed everywhere, and TV commercials were filled with excited kids in new clothes clutching brand new notebooks and backpacks. THEY all seemed so happy to be returning to school after a summer of not-a-care-in-the-world… (what was WRONG with those kids???) Now, of course, when I see those back to school ads, I smile to myself and think, “hahahaha… I don’t have to go back to school… unless I WANT to…” (And, yes, I’m using my sing-songy, nyah nyah nyah voice when I say that…)

It’s been soooooo hot in Austin lately. Usually we get maybe three or four days of 100+ degree weather during the summer, but this summer we’ve had WEEKS of 100+ weather. Rumor has it we’re supposed to hit 104 or 105 over the weekend. (In contrast, it’s supposed to be mid-80’s in Chicago over the weekend…)

So the possibility of moving to Chicago is looking better and better (apparently I’m not actually supposed to SAY that, because Rick thinks I might jinx it… :)). I’m definitely excited about the prospect of moving up there, but at the same time, I can’t stop thinking about all the stuff I’ll have to do once everything is certain. (Because I’m STILL not willing to actually start planning anything right now. Not until we have an absolute, 100 percent certain offer to move…) So I really shouldn’t even be worrying about all the stuff I MIGHT have to do, when I don’t actually KNOW I’ll have to do any of it. Who knows…

I just saw part of a show on the National Geographic channel about jellyfish… according to the show, these brainless creatures (I’m not being mean – seriously, they have no brains…) are becoming more prolific in oceans throughout the world. Some of them can be deadly if they sting you, even if you manage to get to a hospital. There was one jellyfish in particular that causes all sorts of horrible pain and suffering, and it’s so small you’d barely be able to see it if it was swimming right next to you. And the tiny little thing is showing up in oceans all over the place – not just warm, tropical water, but cooler water as well. There’ve been stings everywhere from Australia to Great Britain. And all I could think, as I was watching this show, was, “I can’t wait to go to Hawaii in September.” Of course, now I’m not sure I’ll actually want to go INTO the ocean, but we’ll see… (Do you think National Geographic over-dramatizes the jellyfish threat for entertainment purposes???)

The light in my laundry room has inexplicably died. At first, I just assumed the bulbs had burned out – but after replacing them with brand new bulbs, the light is STILL stubbornly refusing to work. So I guess it’s the light itself, and not the bulbs. What’s more, my dryer has only been working intermittently – sometimes it’ll run for five or ten minutes, and then stop… and other times, it runs through an entire dry cycle with no problems. So I have to continually monitor it, to make sure I don’t end up with damp clothes. I’m assuming this laundry room breakdown is all some kind of sign that I should stop doing laundry… perhaps I should start taking everything to the dry cleaner’s…

I guess that’s about it for now… hope everyone has a good weekend (and if you live in Texas, try to stay cool…)! Better go check on that dryer again…