A few random odds and ends...

Happy Friday, everyone! It’s been another exciting, fun-filled week of mountain climbing and spelunking and scuba diving and sky diving and bungee jumping and pogo stick racing… um, okay, I’ve actually never done any of those things… and honestly, I don’t think I WANT to do any of them. (Well, maybe the pogo stick racing… I mean, I totally made that up, but I’m betting that SOMEone, SOMEwhere, has challenged a friend to a pogo stick race once or twice…)

So in reality, it was a rather non-eventful week. Although Rick did have a job interview this morning, which lately is kind of a big deal around here. It’s something he feels pretty hopeful about, so we’ll see what happens with that…

What’s funny is that if you go to Yahoo.com today (go ahead, I’ll wait…) there’s a story about “America’s best cities for jobs.” And the little picture over to the left is the 360 bridge here in Austin. Austin is number 8 on the list – apparently we’ve ADDED 3,300 jobs in the last year, while most other cities in the country have lost jobs. But that doesn’t make much sense to me, since I know of at least ONE company, in particular, that probably single-handedly laid off a few thousand people. (I suppose said company should remain nameless for the time being…) So does that mean Austin actually added somewhere in the neighborhood of 6,000 jobs?? Because if 3,000 people were laid off, but we added 3,000 jobs, then that just means we broke even…

Interestingly, the best city in the country for jobs right now is Huntsville, Alabama – the city where Rick was born. (The city where I was born – Buffalo, New York – is nowhere to be seen… hmmm… :))

So yesterday I was trying to think of something to write for my Facebook “status update.” In case anyone doesn’t use Facebook (Faisal, I’m looking your way – get with the times already… everybody’s doing it… are you susceptible to peer pressure?? :)), a status update is just a little blurb you can write at the top of your page so people know what you’re doing or how you’re feeling or what you’re thinking at any given time – and you can write them in the third person, which is just loads of fun. (And I’m being totally serious here – I love talking about myself in the third person… Lisa thinks it’s fun… Lisa likes to talk about herself as if she’s a spectator observing from a balcony…) And sometimes you update your status with whatever you are literally doing at that moment (Lisa is doing the laundry… Lisa is cooking dinner… Lisa is heading out to see a movie…). But other times you simply make random observations about your life (Lisa is quite wary of the germ-laden tables at fast food restaurants… Lisa would like to eat infinite amounts of chocolate and never gain a pound… Lisa is terrified of strawberry seeds…).

You see how it works, right? So as I was saying, I was trying to think of something to write yesterday, and my mind was totally blank. I had no idea what to write in my “status update” box. So that’s what I wrote – “Lisa wants to update her status, but can’t think of anything interesting to say.” My Aunt Carol commented that it was interesting that I had nothing to say – which, actually, IS rather interesting, considering that I was just now able to come up with half a dozen decent status updates in the last couple paragraphs. I may have to update my Facebook page again and use one of them…

But that comment made me think about how even though I’m one of the LEAST talkative people I know (yes, Lisa knows Lisa quite well), I’m also one of the MOST talkative people I know. It’s this funny sort of paradox – I don’t talk much when I talk, but I definitely talk a lot when I write. I don’t SAY much, but I have a lot to say. I may get tongue-tied now and then, but I never seem to get… uh… finger-tied?? And it all goes back to my assertion that writing is just as valid a form of communication as talking – although some people seem to have a different opinion about that…

Now if you’ll excuse her, Lisa is off to update her Facebook status…

Happy birthday, Eric!!!!

It's Eric's birthday! He's soooooo much older than I am (although we're not sure HOW much older, of course, because the gypsies who dropped him off on our doorstep didn't tell us...). Just kidding, Eric! Maybe... :)

Here's a picture of me and dad and Eric from way back when... I know it looks like I'm older than Eric here, but we all know THAT can't be possible, right? :) I just love my face in this picture -- I seem to be rather suspicious of the new kid... and for some reason, even though we were in Buffalo, NY, I'm flashing a Longhorn sign with my right hand. Apparently even at this young age, I knew I'd eventually be a UT fan...


And here's Eric today, seemingly quite suspicious of the girl behind the camera... probably because she keeps insisting that she's younger than he is...


So happy birthday, Crazy Eric!! Wish I was up there in Chicago so we could hang out and you could buy me dinner... because that's the birthday tradition... when it's your birthday, you buy stuff for your sister. Dontcha just love tradition?? :)

Put... the cookie... down...

The other day I read an interesting little article about how our food portion sizes have changed over the last 20 years or so. While the number of calories we SHOULD be eating every day of course has remained constant, the amount of food prepared for us has grown much larger. So while we may think we’re doing okay by eating one solitary bagel, the SIZE of that bagel has increased from a small 140-calorie ring to a 300-plus-calorie, CD-sized treat. Add a couple ounces of cream cheese and you’re pushing the 500-calorie range.

Pasta dishes in restaurants have doubled in size, going from a reasonable-for-dinner 500 calories per plate to over one thousand calories – depending on the sauce, I imagine that calorie count could go much higher (have you SEEN a recipe for Alfredo sauce???). French fry portions have doubled or even tripled, depending on what size you order with your fast food meal. And even “healthy” choices like turkey sandwiches can be 800-calories-worth-of-huge in this day and age.

And then today I read about an Australian study that concluded the weight problem in America is due to overeating. Wow – thanks Australia. We never would’ve figured that one out on our own. Of COURSE the “obesity epidemic” in America is caused by too much food. But at this point, everyone should be AWARE of the fact that restaurants serve ridiculously huge portions – it's not exactly a secret. It shouldn’t be a surprise that the Gigantohumungous Meal on Random Fast Food Restaurant’s menu contains more calories than a single person should be eating in an entire DAY – let alone a single meal. And yet people will STILL order an extra large container of fries and a triple cheeseburger and an extra large milkshake… and a Diet Coke, of course. Don’t want to go overboard…

And then we actually wonder WHY we can’t lose weight. It annoys me to no end when I hear someone who is significantly overweight claiming, “I don’t eat any more than anyone else… I just have a slow metabolism.” Um, nope. Sorry. While some people ARE blessed with ridiculously fast metabolisms (Eric, I’m looking at you – you annoyingly thin person who can eat whatever you want… heehee… :)), the fact of the matter is, metabolic differences are pretty minor. You’re not going to gain a hundred pounds because you have a “slow metabolism.” It is physically IMPOSSIBLE to maintain a weight that high WITHOUT consuming enough calories to maintain it. Oh, there ARE occasional medical exceptions – Cushing’s disease comes to mind – but those are very few and far between. The way most people talk, you’d think our country was overrun with medical maladies that directly result in fat gain. In reality, it’s all the FOOD that results in fat gain…

The other thing that annoys me is HOW people attempt to lose weight. Because everyone seems to be operating under this delusion that there’s more to it than simple “calories in versus calories burned,” we’ve been bombarded with a plethora of “diet strategies”: no carbs, no fat, don’t eat fruit, only drink cold water, corn syrup is evil, cut out all dairy, cut out all white foods altogether, don’t eat after 6pm, etc., etc., etc… People try to make it SO complicated, when in fact, it’s very easy – burn more calories than you eat. Period. They can be ANY calories from ANY food eaten at ANY time – but if the total calories you burn off during any given time is MORE than the total calories you’ve eaten during that time, you WILL lose weight.

And I know what I’m talking about – I lost about thirty pounds a couple years ago, and have (give or take 5 or 7 pounds) kept it off. And I did it by gradually making SMALL changes that really started to add up after a while – drinking water instead of soda, keeping ice cream and cookies out of the house altogether, paying attention to portion size, scouring the internet for healthy recipes – and supplementing it all with a lot more activity. My pedometer is one of the best purchases I’ve made in recent memory. I have NOT, however, cut anything completely out of my life… I’ve just changed the way I eat and/or drink. Take coffee for instance – no way am I ever giving up coffee… it’s one of the small joys in my life. But I DID change my caramel latte habit to a cappuccino habit – which shaves off about 200 calories a day. And the cookies and ice cream that I’ve banned from my house? I make sure to go OUT somewhere and have a seriously decadent dessert once a week – otherwise I’ll feel like I’m totally deprived of chocolate and end up making AND devouring an entire batch of cookies in one sitting. And carbs? I’m actually thinking about making lasagna for dinner tonight (with lots of veggies and less cheese)…

The final key, of course, is to make sure you’re eating properly for the REST of your life. That’s the major reason “diets” fail. Because if you feel like you’re “on a diet,” then at some point you think you can come OFF that diet. But once you start eating the way you used to eat, all the weight comes right back on. The smaller you are, the less food you need. Again, it’s a simple equation.

So now I’m off to eat my 60-calorie per serving soup (Progresso Light – it’s actually pretty good stuff… although not quite as good as Amy’s Organic, which is my favorite soup ever – and everything on the list of ingredients is totally pronounceable). And afterwards I shall attempt to add more steps to my pedometer. Because, as I have learned, my weight really is MY responsibility – it is NOT the responsibility of the government, or Dr. Atkins, or McDonald’s, or my “slow metabolism.”

Although seriously, Eric – so unfair… ;)

Multiple madness...

So I had a fairly uneventful weekend… I think… I mean, I can’t really remember anything interesting happening, so yeah – I’m gonna go with “uneventful.” Saturday was ridiculously rainy and unseasonably cool – which meant that I discovered I had (inadvertently) dressed inappropriately for the weather as soon as I stepped outside. I turned around and went back into the house for a long-sleeved t-shirt before Rick and I ventured out to the mall. And I suppose THAT was the highlight of my weekend – my trip to the mall, where I finally made use of some gift cards I received for Christmas. I bought lots of girly, perfumed lotions and sprays. (I just love Bath and Bodyworks… :))

Oh, in other “what happened over the weekend” news: I have finally climbed out of the fantasy baseball basement, and am now on the fantasy baseball, oh, let’s call it the second floor – I can see the sunlight through the windows, but I’m definitely not in the penthouse suite yet. (In other words, I’m in sixth place. I could’ve just said, “I’m in sixth place,” but I so enjoy my Fantasy Baseball Hotel analogy…) My offense had an extremely productive weekend – my guys were hitting home runs and stealing bases left and right. Let’s hope they can all keep this up for the rest of the season. Even my up-until-now abysmal pitching is starting to show signs of life, so I am cautiously optimistic about the next few months…

So does anyone else wonder when the TLC channel (and yes, I realize TLC stands for “the learning channel” so I basically just said “the the learning channel channel”) turned into the “families with a gazillion children” channel (which would be “TFWAGCC”)?? It seems like every other show on TLC has something to do with gigantic families. First there’s the Duggar family – a family of about thirty-nine children (okay, I think it’s actually “only” eighteen or nineteen…) who annoy me to no end. I don’t even know why, exactly – I’m sure the Duggars are perfectly nice people. And I give them credit for actually taking responsibility for their insanely huge family – somehow, they manage to afford all those kids and their need for food and shelter. But it always makes me bristle to hear someone say they’re leaving the size of their family “up to God.” As if we’re all a bunch of mindless marionettes who can’t make decisions and must simply sit around until the strings are pulled. That’s why God gave us a BRAIN – so we could at least ATTEMPT to use it once in a while. And besides – why on earth would you pop out baby after baby after baby when there are SO MANY children out there who need homes? If you want a gigantic family, fine – but at some point, can’t you put your own selfishness aside and make room for a family member who does NOT share in your gene pool??? Grrrrrr... (can you tell this a pet peeve of mine? :))

And now there’s a new show called “Table for Twelve,” or something like that. This is a family with a measly ten kids (the Duggars must laugh at the quaintness of it all…), who, apparently, sit around a great big table together. Okay, I haven’t actually SEEN the show, because, as may be obvious, I really don’t like shows about tons of kids. But the MOST annoying show of them all – and I’ve held this opinion since I first saw a five or ten minute clip a couple years ago – is Jon and Kate Plus 8. The first time I saw part of that show, I had to turn it off – I could not STAND to watch Kate and her sanctimonious attitude and her nitpicky nagging and her obvious, belittling dislike of her husband. Even those small clips I saw made me think, “why on earth are these two together?” I could never bring myself to watch an entire episode, for fear I would type off some kind of hate mail to TLC and demand they bring back the interesting shows they USED to air...

And what a shock – now all the tabloids are abuzz with gossip over Jon’s affair and Kate’s affair and the probable end of their marriage. And I have to admit, my first thought was, “Jon had an affair? Huh… I don’t blame him…” It reminded me of one of Rick’s and my favorite shows, The Soup – every Friday night, The Soup recaps the most ridiculous clips from talk shows and reality shows from the previous week. Every now and then, they’ll have a clip from Jon and Kate Plus 8 – usually one where Kate is trying her best to make Jon look like an idiot. They’ll then cut back to the host of The Soup, who advertises a fictional upcoming show on TLC – Jon Minus 9. And it looks like that might not be so far off now…

Can it possibly be worth it? If you have a gigantic family, is it honestly worth the exploitation to gain fame and fortune? I mean, I have a feeling Jon and Kate would’ve had problems even WITHOUT all the cameras… but then again, maybe the Duggars and any other huge TLC families should get out NOW while their families are still happy and intact.

And don’t even get me STARTED on Octomom…

Green with envy...

So I was told that my Saudi Arabia post had a “Jon Stewart” quality to it – which I’ve decided to take as a compliment, since Jon Stewart can be a funny guy when he wants to be. And just to clarify – I make no claims to know all the answers to all the problems in the world. And I would never want to berate people who are genuinely HAPPY with the lives they’ve chosen for themselves – although I think a certain freedom of choice should be offered. But there are a lot of complex issues out there… child marriages excluded, in my opinion. That’s not a complex issue at all. Quite simple, actually. Just protect those who are unable to protect themselves, that’s all I’m saying…

I saw a quote from Aldous Huxley the other day that seemed to resonate with me: “to travel is to discover that everyone is wrong about other countries.” This is usually the attitude I try to embrace when I visit a new place – never assume that everything you’ve heard is correct. Wait until you experience it for yourself. And like I said in that previous post, I TRY to give Saudi Arabia the benefit of the doubt, since I never HAVE been there. But there are some things I don’t have to “experience” to know they’re wrong…

But that same quote can apply to places much closer to home, too. After we moved to Texas from Buffalo, New York when I was nine years old, we went back up north for a visit one year and someone asked my mom if we lived in a desert and saw a lot of tumbleweeds. I suppose she must’ve been surprised to learn that Austin is full of lakes and rivers and hills and greenery, with nary a desert in sight. And I think the only time I’ve ever seen a tumbleweed was out near Yuma, Arizona, as we drove past sand dunes on our way to San Diego…

Similarly, when I found out we were moving to New Jersey when I was 13, I had visions of living amongst concrete and oil refineries. So imagine my surprise when we drove a few miles away from Newark Airport (which, admittedly, IS surrounded by concrete and oil refineries) and we found ourselves in a hilly, vibrantly green locale. In fact, I don’t hesitate to say that New Jersey is (and probably will always be) the prettiest, greenest place I’ve ever lived. I miss the green of New Jersey – Austin, of course, has plenty of green as well… it’s just a “different” sort of green. The trees in New Jersey are vivid green – like the sort of green color you would’ve pulled out of a crayon box to draw trees when you were a kid. The trees in Texas are more of a “washed out” green. Like they USED to be bright green, and then someone washed them in a tumbling machine full of harsh detergent. They’re still green… they’re just not quite as green as the day you bought them…

So as I’ve grown older, I’ve learned that those preconceived notions about states and countries and people aren’t always accurate, so there’s really no point in discussing them. I prefer to form opinions AFTER I’ve visited a state or a country or become acquainted with people. Of course, there’s a difference between “notions” and “documented fact.” There’s also a difference between respect for a country’s cultural differences and actually UNDERSTANDING the reasoning behind those differences. And I suppose that’s where Saudi Arabia and I have a little bit of a problem. I may strive to respect (most) of its culture, but that’s not to say I understand it…

I DO, however, understand that the trees outside my window aren’t quite as green as the ones in New Jersey… sigh... :)

Happy Mom's Day!!

Happy Mother's Day, Leilani! Er, I mean, mom!! :) Yes, my mom's name is Leilani, but no, she's not Hawaiian. My grandfather played steel guitar, and he and my grandmother looooved Hawaiian music. Their favorite song was "Sweet Leilani." So when my mom was born -- even though she's not the least bit Hawaiian -- she was bestowed with that moniker. And ever since, she's been constantly correcting the spelling and pronunciation of people unfamiliar with the name. :) (Except, of course, when we go to Hawaii, where it's used for everything from bakeries to hotels to streets to Hawaiian residents... it's kind of like the name "Jennifer" here on the mainland...) I have to give my grandparents credit, though, for choosing a name that was not only unusual (for most of the country), but also NOT "trendy." Trendy names tend to start out as "unusual" -- until everyone else in the world catches on to the trend...

So happy Mom's Day to my mom -- whose name is never written correctly on Starbucks cups, but who is always so generous when I need a cup of coffee. :) Love you, mom!!!

Dear Saudi Arabia,

How are you? I am fine.

Okay, now that the pleasantries are out of the way – I think we need to have a little talk. I couldn’t help but notice that you’ve had some problems with your image lately. All these stories in the news about little girls married off to men old enough to be their grandfathers are REALLY not helping. And now it has come to my attention that you are “mulling over” a ban on marriages to children. Um, seriously, Saudi Arbaia? You’re MULLING IT OVER?? What, exactly, is there to mull? Call me crazy, but I don’t think forcing eight-year-old children to marry disgusting 50-year-old pedophiles is a practice that warrants a lot of “mulling over.” It’s WRONG. End of story.

Look, Saudi Arabia – I like you. I really do. You can be quite mysterious and beautiful when you want to be. You probably haven’t heard a lot of terms of endearment lately, and that’s a shame. But let’s be honest – isn’t it kind of your own fault? You can’t expect people to be showering you with accolades when you’re advocating this sort of child abuse… especially if you have to “mull over” the criminalization of said abuse. Get with it, Saudi Arabia – just because something has been mired in outdated “tradition” doesn’t mean it should be embraced.

And don’t get me wrong – I’m fine with many of your traditions. Your cultural practices aren’t for everyone, to be certain – but that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re outright wrong. Hey, I can respect the call for modesty… I would have no problem covering head to toe and maneuvering incognito amongst the population – a population that would, no doubt, deem me invisible or at least inconsequential. But I hate being the center of attention anyway – so invisibility holds a certain appeal for me. I’ll even give you a free pass for the driving thing – I don’t much like to drive, either, so if I was required to be carted around by a man, I suppose I could get used to it…

I have a little less tolerance for your apparent assumption that women are perpetually children, however. I AM perfectly capable of leaving my house without a male relative to accompany me. I AM perfectly capable of traveling by myself. I AM an adult, believe it or not. What I can’t help but wonder is, if all these rules and regulations are in place to prevent inciting the insatiable desires of men (what kind of men do you HAVE over there, exactly??), why is it always the WOMEN who are punished for indiscretions? Why not require that all MEN are accompanied by a gaggle of FEMALE relatives every time THEY leave the house, so their sisters and aunts can keep an eye on them and make sure they don’t do anything stupid??? I’m just sayin’…

But even this practice (although slightly insulting to my intelligence) is one I would respect, if I happened to be within your borders and found myself in need of a trip to the grocery store or a Starbucks (because yes, Saudi Arabia – even YOU have Starbucks…). But this child marriage thing – c’mon, SA, use your brain… er, or whatever passes for a “brain” when you’re talking about a country. I want to love you Saudi Arabia, but sometimes you make it so difficult. It pains me that we’ll probably never meet face-to-face, and yet I wish you could be more welcoming and protective of your current residents – especially the children.

Think about it, Saudi Arabia…

Love and very chaste little air kisses, Lisa