How to lose weight on a cruise...

So now that I’m home, I’m faced with a question – what do I write about now? Should I talk about all the laundry I did today, which is always my favorite part of returning from vacation? (That was sarcasm, in case it didn’t translate…) Should I talk about the cool shirt I bought in Las Vegas? (It’s from the clothing line of Sean Puffy P Diddy Supercalifragilistic Combs – I didn’t even know he HAD a clothing line. Fortunately it was on sale, because apparently Mr. Diddy laces his clothing with solid gold threads. The “retail” price was more than I’d ever be willing to spend for a single shirt…) Or should I talk about how I finally got back on my treadmill today and walked a couple miles? (I always miss my workouts when I’m on vacation…) I’ve already talked about toes, so really, what else is there to talk about?

Actually, I really DID miss working out when I was gone. It’s funny, because I always have such good intentions when I go on vacation. I always PLAN to find the time and energy to work out, going so far as to make sure my sneakers and shorts and old t-shirts are packed, so I can throw them on and find a gym at a moment’s notice. The problem is, once I’m finally at my destination and reveling in all of the fun things a vacation affords, exercise suddenly takes a back seat. It becomes this sort of faraway, fuzzy thought that only surfaces after overindulgence, when I swear I can feel the pounds accumulating. And then, because I’m so sleepy from all that food, I drift off into another night of slumber, awakening to a rumbling stomach (how is it possible to be so HUNGRY after eating so much the night before??) and a mind completely focused on vacationing and NOT on treadmills.

What’s really strange is that I’ve found cruises seem to offer the most chances for exercise of any sort of vacation. Before I ever went on a cruise, I heard so many stories from people who said they gained ten pounds in one week on a cruise ship. And the first time I was on one, I realized that might actually be possible – there’s an awful lot of food on a cruise ship. Everything from 24-hour room service to midnight buffets. You can walk onto any deck anywhere and find something to eat or drink. I can’t remember if I gained any weight on that first cruise, but I soon figured something out. If you make a little bit of an effort, you can actually LOSE weight on a cruise ship…

I’ve come home from at least three cruises lighter than when I left. There are a couple secrets (or maybe it’s just common sense) to ensure this happens. First, while cruise ships are large by “ship” standards, they’re still compact as far as a “community” goes. Everything is either up a few flights of stairs or down a few flights. So after that first cruise, I stopped taking the elevators everywhere. I always take the stairs, which at times can be eight or nine flights at a time. Spend an entire day on a ship NOT using the elevator, and I guarantee you’ll get a bit of a workout. Second, I like to get out at ports of call and walk around. Next time I go on a cruise, I’m making sure to take my pedometer to see how far I walk. (Because sometimes it seems like it’s awfully far…) And third, of course, I TRY to only eat when I get hungry. I usually fail miserably in my attempts, but I make it up with yet another hike up the stairs…

And surprisingly, all that stair-climbing, and all the exploration of foreign cities, and all those failed attempts to eat only breakfast, lunch, and dinner result in returning home with looser-fitting clothing and a lower number on the scale. I never would’ve thought it was possible, after hearing all those, “I gained so much weight on that cruise!” stories.

Of course, on the vacation I just returned from, I rarely used stairs, and I was sitting in a car much of the time. So I definitely have to say – I really WAS happy to return to my workouts today. And I still have all that chocolate to deal with…