Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Well, THIS doesn't bode well...

The first game of the baseball season started this morning at 5 a.m. A strange time for a baseball game, certainly… but the Red Sox and the A’s were in Japan – and in Japan, when it’s 5 a.m. Tuesday morning HERE, it’s like 8 o’clock next Friday evening over THERE. (Okay, that’s not true… they’re 14 hours ahead of us. So 5 a.m. here would be 7 p.m. in Japan… :)) I had a dream at some point during the night that the Red Sox won the game with a score of 6-0. And when I finally got around to turning on the TV this morning (at about 8:45 a.m. Texas time/10:45 p.m. Japan time), I noticed the score was 6-4 Red Sox. Hey! I thought, I was right about the six runs! I was feeling quite impressed with my amateur psychic abilities. And then I realized the game was in the tenth inning… which meant that at SOME point, the game had been tied, and the Red Sox managed to break the tie and go ahead. And THEN I realized that for this inaugural game of the glorious baseball season, I’d been sure to play every Boston and Oakland player on my fantasy baseball team. Three altogether… INCLUDING the Oakland closer. The Oakland closer who allowed the Red Sox to go ahead in the tenth inning, and earned himself a nice little loss because of it.

OH C’MON! ARE YOU KIDDING ME??

Sigh… first game of the season, and my closer ALREADY screws up. A blown save loss means I’ll have like negative fifty billion points tomorrow, and it’s only the FIRST DAY. When all of our fantasy baseball points have been accumulated and our teams are ranked accordingly, I’ll be looking up from the very bottom. Even the guys who had NO players today will start tomorrow with zero points… and even ZERO is better than whatever I’ll end up with. I’m sitting on the floor of a very dark barrel, where I can lift my head and just barely manage to see the light at the top…

(Go toward the light, Lisa! GO TOWARD THE LIGHT!)

Wait a minute… I may have negative fifty billion points right now, but I have to remember – this was the FIRST DAY of the baseball season. And this first day only consisted of ONE game. One day, one game… in the grand scheme of baseball seasons, that is merely a drop in the bottom of the bucket where I now reside. This is not the end… it’s only the beginning…

Isn't baseball great? :)

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well regardless of the score at the end of the day you'll always be a zero to me!!!! um... wait...

Anonymous said...

everyone gets a blown save or seven during the season... :)

Note...I am not starting Rich Harden. I heard that the Japanese air is really thin and baseballs just fly out of the parks which are about half the size of American ballparks. Aaaaaaaand, there is some sorta of super strong thermal air current that carries balls even further. Aaaaaaaand, that baseball players eat too much sushi and sushi and sports just don't mix.

Lisa said...

Eric -- I thought I told you NOT to act like a 13-year-old... only Jennifer Garner can pull that off... :)

Tim -- You know how they have those tiny little hotel rooms in Japan? The ones that are just little pods in the wall? Yeah, it's probably the same way with their baseball stadiums... they're like pod stadiums... tiny little pod stadiums. And by the way, sushi doesn't mix with ANYTHING... (of course, that's just the opinion of my fish-hating self...) :)

Anonymous said...

mmmmmm....love sushi. each little roll is a work of art.

Anonymous said...

It would take at least a 14 year old to come up with something so darn clever...